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Tom Herman’s Championship Focus Begins With Your Urine


Texas football coach Tom Herman, who leapfrogged his way into the Power 5 conference by going 22-4 in two years at Houston, is committed to winning football games.

Like, Jim Harbaugh committed.

According to the Herman school of coaching, brown pee means missing out on a bowl game.

Yellow pee means you’re only thinking of yourself.

You need to have championship hydration levels to roll with this squad.

Part transparency, part funny joke, and part psychological mind play, Tom Herman is imbuing the culture at Texas with winning again. After three years with Charlie Strong at the helm, the environment around Texas football was consider toxic. Level 8 toxic.

However, the fans, players, and (most importantly?) boosters, are believing in Herman’s track record and charismatic coaching style.

The attention to detail that Herman has brought is likewise impressive. Hang a urine chart above the urinals: thinking outside the box. Laminating the chart considering its proximity to streams of urine: That’s realizing that there is no box.

Herman will be expected to show progress in year one.

Hook Em’ nation has grown tired of being a part of the reason the Big 12 has nearly a laughing stock.

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    Michael is originally from Miami, FL and is of Cuban descent. He holds BFA from the University of Florida/New World School of the Arts and is also a New York city based stand-up comedian. Michael is 5'11", but wears elevators in his shoes to make himself 6 feet tall. Twitter: @MichaelNapoles
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